Tuesday, October 7, 2008

26, Just What I Needed!!!!

Boy oh Boy!!! For the past couple of weeks I have been reflecting on the past year! 25! I have been through hell and back in just one year. I was in what can be called an abusive realtionship (mentally), a very dear friend of mine passed away, wrestling with myself and with God became an ongoing struggle and after having prayed to be stretched, God answered my prayer, which in turn placed me in a position that forced me to be more transparent and to dig deeper into my calling as a worship leader. Whew!!! Praise God He was there the whole time to sustain me. Honestly,from October 25, 2007 all the way up until October 5, 2008 I felt all alone, like I was enduring all these things by myself. My New Year's Resolution for 2008 was simply just to "Live" and to live according to the definition of the word...

LIVE is defined this way: to continue to have life; remain alive;to continue in existence;to maintain or support one's existence; provide for oneself; to pass life in a specified manner; to experience or enjoy life to the full;to escape destruction or remain afloat

Quite frankly, up until my 26th birthday, I felt like I was doing the exact opposite of what I destined to do; I felt dead for a load of reasons.

Sunday, woke me up!!!! It took a "roast" at my birthday dinner for me to wake up!!! Behind all the hilarious things my loved ones shared, I was able to see that they all see my heart and that is most important. For the first time in a long time I was in a room with 30 people and I DIDN'T feel alone! God, through the words of those that shared, reminded me who HE sees when He looks at me. I was reminded of I am through Him and who I am striving to be.

Who would have thought that someone that so simple as a "Roast" would bring so much comfort, love, joy and revival? Not me!